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Caylee Anthony – Haleigh Cummings - The Stupidity Continues

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Normal Caylee Anthony – Haleigh Cummings - The Stupidity Continues

Post by Wrapitup on Thu Sep 17, 2009 10:34 pm

Caylee Anthony – Haleigh Cummings - The Stupidity Continues
Posted on September 17th, 2009 by Simon Barret

We have followed these stories very closely here at BNN. For months we reported what we knew. Much of it was not very good for the Anthony family. They were, and are, maybe the dumbest family in America, but it is only a ‘maybe’, the family of missing tot Haleigh Cummings may have them beat. In fact I am surprised that some enterprising media type has not pushed the idea of a game show ‘America’s Stupidest Family!’.

Of course there are many stupid families, but the Cummings-Croslin’s and the Anthony’s do seem like prime real estate. I can hear the questions now on the new game show. Our Mistress of ceremonies would have to be Nancy Grace.

NG: How many dead children does it take to get on Nancy Grace?

Ronald Cummings hits the win button ‘Miss Nancy, only one’ is his answer.

NG: How many Foundations do you need to find a missing child”?

Cindy Anthony hits the button. ‘The more foundations the better, we were kinda sorta worried about where next four star meal was coming from, but with all of our sleazy connections, we are doing fine’.

Off Camera: WTF are we going to do, I have an hour long show and no one is pumping my book! Only two callers have told me how wonderful my twins are. Not even Ronald said anything nice, and I made sure that he was dressed well, a shirt that fitted, and a tie that did not upset the camera guy! Hell at this rate I am going to have to do real news! Come on people, lets get behind the project. Push the book, I had the best ‘ghostwriter’, its a cracking read. In retrospect maybe I should had have included a few hundred pictures of the twins. I’ll do that with my next book ‘Assholes Thirteen’, oh damn it, George Clooney has beaten me to the story line.

NG: OK, question number four, Ron, I have the hots for you, thats why I keep eating up air time with you, do you share my feelings?

Um, Miss Nancy, I do have feelings for you, you are the only media person that I want to spend time with. I am wondering if you might have some free time at the weekend to come visit. I am sure that I can get Misty to go on a drug binge. hell, I’ll give her $20. That should be enough for a couple of hits of crack and a bottle of Olde English. Thats the best Malt Liquor you can get in Putnam.

NG: An open question, who can answer this one. For $1000 who has the best story about stolen checks?

Cindy Anthony leaps in: Well for a $1000 I am prepared to answer that one. My daughter Casey knows all about stolen checks. But, she is innocent! Our independent investigators are on board. Caylee Anthony had nothing to do with it. Oops, I meant my daughter Casey. Stolen checks? What stolen checks? Target should be ashamed of themselves for selling sleazy underwear and beer! George and I don’t have time for underwear and beer. We are way too busy making money.

NG: Lets head to our other top story, the release of my book. Oops, I meant to say my twins. Oops again I really meant to say Haleigh Cummings. Our original plan was to cover some news, but John Michael, and doesn’t he look cute in this outfit? Anyway, we decided to skillfully avoid news stories, in favor of all of you buying my new book.

NG: My producers originally wanted to do a very boring show. They wanted to do news! Well I shut that idea down in no time flat.

NG: Bombshell!!!!! the twins have just passed their first solid stools. I will have pictures up and running momentarily. I think that one is bigger than the other, I want my fans, oh the ones who bought my book, to weigh in.

This is Nancy Grace, who once again has skillfully avoided the news. We were going to have a couple of people on that actually had something useful to say, but that would have taken up time for me talking about the twins.

Off Camera: OK, so you have two people on the story, one knows what is going on, and the other is a few thousand mile away and can’t remember who the people are. Lets go with him. Hell, he might even promote my book on his site!

Simon Barrett

comment below and link:

treece said,in September 17th, 2009 at 8:47 pm wow simon, did ng get on a nerve this week?? haha
Fedup said,in September 17th, 2009 at 8:49 pm This was an absolute waste of a read. You should be ashamed for writing such trash.
Fedup said,in September 17th, 2009 at 8:51 pm Oh, and to had to mention also that:

The fact that all this stems from missing children and we all have watched so closely at others being side tracked into the ‘circus’ of it all….I guess you got sucked in too eh Simon? Come on…Really?
John H. Gohde said,in September 17th, 2009 at 8:58 pm Once upon a time, talk show hosts couldn’t promote their new books on the air without buying air time. Just about everybody is advertising their book on HLN, probably for free. I can count at least three different books being shamelessly promoted on HLN. Will there be more?
Wait a minute said,in September 17th, 2009 at 8:58 pm Dayum Simon, you forgot about the bonus! With every three books you buy, you’ll receive your very own blow up Ronald doll. When you pull the string, he mutters a sexy “I dunno, I wuz at werk”. Get em while their hot ladies!!!
Hell_O said,in September 17th, 2009 at 9:06 pm Ronald Cummings was copying Cobra with the purple tie. Cobra wore a purple tie to court a few weeks ago. OR maybe Cobra lent it to him.

What say you, Cobra?
VivaMalesherbes said,in September 17th, 2009 at 9:16 pm Totally excellent story!
Protect Children said,in September 17th, 2009 at 9:34 pm Please remember we should all take these cases seriously:

- Caylee Anthony was murdered
- Haleigh Cummings is a missing child

Also, when I moved from the northeast to Florida several years ago I soon learned a custom down here where people include Miss before a female’s first name as a sign of respect. It’s not unusual to go into a restaurant, store, etc. where someone knows your first name and says “hello Miss —”. It a sign of respect we should be teaching our children not making fun of adults who use the term.
shawna13 said,in September 17th, 2009 at 9:47 pm Absolutely loved it!!!!!
mlee said,in September 17th, 2009 at 9:56 pm simon, I can hear the fustration, in your words.. Bounced again, and again and again…
I have no answers..
Wait a minute said,in September 17th, 2009 at 10:01 pm Protect Children~

Nice try, but your logic would only apply if that dolt Ronnie boy would address all the females this way. Nancy Grace is the only female I’ve ever heard Ronald address as “Mizz”, otherwise his preference of words for women include “stupid bitch” hey? Right? Can I get a “HELL YEAAAAAHHHH” and a shout out to all you hee haw fans!!!

Please don’t make me dumb down for you again, thanks sweetie.
Bewildered said,in September 17th, 2009 at 10:05 pm Oh MY, you may have crossed the line, but you totally cracked me up laughing! I hope everyone else takes it that way:))) i think we are all a little giddy & energized (not a bad thing).

This case is stressing everyone out who cares about Haleigh & all jokes asides I thank everyone (who was still there when this was almost a cold case) & I understand too others who had to do what they had to do, but their hearts were/are with Haleigh<3 Life isn’t perfect, but everyone wants to know the same thing…Where is Haleigh? And it doesn’t seem like a hard question or brain surgery!!!
nance said,in September 17th, 2009 at 10:11 pm mlee,

So can I (hear the frustration). Understandably so . . .

Nancy Grace smiles and thanks Ronald for “not knowing” anything, but she pulls back her lips and reveals her fangs, to snarl at Crystal Sheffield.

Art Harris and Nancy Grace just seem most interested in promoting themselves.
treece said,in September 17th, 2009 at 10:13 pm protect children, you are correct these are
serious situations -
i have lived in texas & oklahoma all my life
and guys have used that expression “miss” as
a sign of respect or fondness - thanks for pointing that out -

Prayers for our little HaLeigh Cummings, wherever she may be!!

Nine-tenths of wisdom is appreciation. Go find somebody’s hand and squeeze it, while there’s time.
-- Dale Dauten--

Thank you RAINE for all you ARE!! I will ALWAYS hold you in my Heart!!

Join date : 2009-05-28

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Normal Re: Caylee Anthony – Haleigh Cummings - The Stupidity Continues

Post by Guest on Fri Sep 18, 2009 9:32 pm

BAZAR! Hope Simon reads the comments.

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Normal Re: Caylee Anthony – Haleigh Cummings - The Stupidity Continues

Post by CritterFan1 on Sat Sep 19, 2009 5:17 pm

but I swear when Ron says it he is smirking, like he knows something she does not know or the smirk like ' I have seen you in your underwear'

Join date : 2009-06-01

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