How to Protect Your Child from Sexual Predators

How do you know whom to trust, and how to protect your child?

A lot of parents worry about strangers, but when it comes to sexual abuse, but the bad guys often aren’t strangers at all.

What's much more common is somebody that's a very trusted person to the child, It could be a family member, it could be a close person to the child, like a coach or instructor or a counselor, someone at their church.

Abuse often starts with the predator "grooming" a child, And that's where they gain the child's trust and they become more and more intimate with the child. It may start out innocently, Taking the child to get ice cream or spending a little extra time at school with the child, giving special interest to that child.
Then it may move to something like a backrub, something that is sort of invasive, but the child find it to be pleasurable. They're getting special attention.

But as a parent, how do you know?
You should watch for a change in your child's behavior, like a kid who loves school but suddenly doesn't want go.

For a younger child, they used to sleep through the night great, eat great, toileting issues were fine, and then something changes.

It's never too early to start protecting your child, and that means talking about what's private and what's not. Kids as young as 2 or 3 can understand certain areas of their bodies are "off limits."

You can say, for example, ‘the part that's under a swimsuit,’ because it's not just genitals, that is their private area and other people just can't touch it.

We think of teenagers as more able to fend off abuse, but they need approval, and understanding, and that can make them vulnerable.

I would worry about that if I had a child that was in that preteen or early teen years and somebody that was, say in their early 20s, was their best friend. It may be innocent, but you kind of want your red flag to go up that point.

It's not unusual for boys to wait years before reporting sexual abuse. That may be because they may feel shame, especially if their abuser was a male. Often kids feel they must have done something to warrant the abuse and that's not true.

Child sexual abuse is an especially complicated form of abuse because of its layers of guilt and shame. It's important to recognize that sexual abuse doesn't always involve body contact. Exposing a child to sexual situations or material is sexually abusive, whether or not touching is involved.

While news stories of sexual predators are scary, what is even more frightening is that sexual abuse usually occurs at the hands of someone the child knows and should be able to trust—most often close relatives. And contrary to what many believe, it’s not just girls who are at risk. Boys and girls both suffer from sexual abuse. In fact, sexual abuse of boys may be under reported due to shame and stigma.

The problem of shame and guilt in child sexual abuse

Aside from the physical damage that sexual abuse can cause, the emotional component is powerful and far-reaching. Sexually abused children are tormented by shame and guilt. They may feel that they are responsible for the abuse or somehow brought it upon themselves. This can lead to self-loathing and sexual problems as they grow older—often either excessive promiscuity or an inability to have intimate relations.

The shame of sexual abuse makes it very difficult for children to come forward. They may worry that others won’t believe them, will be angry with them, or that it will split their family apart. Because of these difficulties, false accusations of sexual abuse are not common, so if a child confides in you, take him or her seriously. Don’t turn a blind eye!


Warning signs of sexual abuse in children
*Trouble walking or sitting.
*Displays knowledge or interest in sexual acts inappropriate to his or her age, or even seductive behavior.
*Makes strong efforts to avoid a specific person, without an obvious reason.
*Doesn’t want to change clothes in front of others or participate in physical activities.
*An STD or pregnancy, especially under the age of 14.
*Runs away from home.




Help for child sexual abuse:

1-888-PREVENT (1-888-773-8368) Stop It Now

1-800-656-HOPE Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network (RAINN)

Or visit ChiWorld.org for a list of other international child helplines